Ah Beng talks about Singapore History & Current Affairs...

From a random email

Under the 'Ang Mo' we all live happily together, no complain.

Malaysia & Singapore is one big family in our brains.

One day we both like two durians cannot get along.

Got sharp thorns, poke each other until 'Buay Song'

One moment like brothers, can give and take.

Next moment we kena kicked out by the leg.

Wah! Our towkay also cry like mad,

We all also feel very very sad.

Our neigbours all say, 'Wah they all sure to die!

They got nothing, how to get next bowl of rice?'

So 'Boh Pian,' we all work day and night.

We also join the army so that we can fight.

We don't care others 'see us no up'.

But actually inside we very pain in the heart.

Then slowly hor we grow rich and a bit fat.

Now others talk about us also got some respect.

They scratch their heads and say 'Very farney'

Got nothing how come they can still make money?'

Last time also got no money to buy ice-cream cone.

Nowadays even small kids can also afford handphone.

Seaport, airport also can become Number One.

He! He! Sometimes think about it also very fun.

But some people look at us also not happy.

Actually they jealous don't want to say only.

So every time their country got something wrong.

They all say Singapore's behind it all along.

Everybody know we water no enough.

They turn off tap only we all cannot last.

They threaten us with water supply and shout 'Cut! Cut! Cut!'

Aiyoh! They all think the water is one big ketupat.

We all hear already also Buay Tahan'

Wah liao, they think we small can makan!

But now they 'cow pay cow bu' we all not very scared.

We want to build water desalination plant already so not so bad.

But their own economy now all go bust.

Got to sell water otherwise money no enough.

Then another neighbor say Singapore no friend friend,

Got so much money, a bit more also donno how to lend.

They say we all only one small red dot,

Like the center of a big dartboard.

Maybe they think we mouse and they cat,

That's why they suka suka anyhow talk like that.

But we all still send them a lot of rice.

Show the world we actually very very nice.

Sometimes we 'Cho Ho Sim' also kena whack.

But we all gentleman wan, don't want to fight back.

I think hor maybe they don't understand us very well.

That's why relationship sometimes like heaven sometimes like hell

Some say aiyah our prosperity is all due to luck,

That's why we all 'Siao Siao' can still win the Tiger Cup

I think hor, Singapore is like Chilli Padi in a pot -

Size small small but very very hot.

Marriage: Yes or No?

A friend of mine ask us girls 2 days ago whether we would go for marriage.

Our answers were collectively yes, mainly because of religion.

He then asked : what if religion was out of the equation?

Kaget terus....

After giving some thought, here's my answer.

YES, I will still choose marriage.

Not because of the property and moolah. That can be solved by separating what's yours and mine. No shared account. I can have my place and he can have his place. We will live in either one, and the other rented out/ be the weekend getaway/ place to chill after fights/etc. No sweat.

YES to marriage for commitment reasons. When two are legally bound in matrimony, the other can't run off as and when one likes. Example: Children are huge responsibilities. Without the legal bind, one of the two can just up and go, no frills. At least when the two are legally bound, they can't just run away just because.

YES to marriage for emotional reasons. I'm a woman, and I admit women are more emotionally tangled up when it comes to relationships. If I'm going to sleep with someone, I would very much like to sleep with just that ONE, thank you very much. I may be missing out on variety, but variety does not equate good. It becomes just another physical act night after night. Not what I want.

Which brings to another point: YES to marriage for security reasons. As I said before, I would very much like to sleep with just that ONE. I want to feel loved by someONE, not just anyONE, y'know? I mean, what if Lover of the Day is Mr. Robber, or Mr. Sex-maniac-who-kills-after-one-night-stand, or Mr. Blackmail?

YES to marriage because of my damned pride. I want to be wanted. I want to own and be owned.

I think I'll just rest my case here.

Food for thought: If marriage (proposal) comes into play, couples must first discuss and agree upon 4 things:

1. In-laws: live-in or live out? (2 women at loggerheads makes one ball-less dude)
2. Finance issues (main cause of divorce)
3. Children's discipline (No such thing as "my dad, your mom" among kids)
4. Religion (A house of two religions will only make the kids confused)

After Thought: I need time to think again issues before I can give answers without making a fool outta myself.

Postscript/PS: I need to work on my debating skills. Anyone sells brain lubricant?

Old vs Treachery

A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her faithful aged poodle named Cuddles along for the company.

One day the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, Cuddles discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old poodle thinks, 'Oh, oh! I'm in deep doo-doo now!' Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap the old poodle exclaims loudly, 'Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?'

Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. 'Whew!' says the leopard, 'That was close! That old poodle nearly had me!'

Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So off he goes, but the old poodle sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.

The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, 'Here, monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!

Now, the old poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, 'What am I going to do now?', but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old poodle says,



'Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!

Moral of this story....

Don't mess with old farts .. age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! Bullshit and brilliance only come with age and experience.

Do forward to some "old" friend to give them a "youthful" laugh.

I am in no way insinuating that any of you are old, it's just that some are just more youthfully challenged.

:P

I wrote I think slightly more than a year ago for Project What's after SPM, which I believed failed to launch. Haiz.
Anyway, for your reading.
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What drove me to study what the Chinese would describe as a “cold door subject” was my interest in studying are we are shaped by the people around us. A process, called socialization, is done since one’s babyhood, continuing to his death. In this process, we see how a person is shaped through every interaction in his life course. Not only it helps people understand people, but it helps you understand you.

Anthropology is derived from Greek words “anthropos”, which means “human”, and “logia” which means “discourse” or “discussion”. It is a study of the culture, belief and practices of living people, with the goal of providing a holistic account of humans and human nature itself. Sociology, as the name connotes, is a study and analysis of the human social structure and activity, with the goal of pursuing social well-being for all man. In simpler (albeit in extremely inaccurate) words, anthropology is the studies the individual and his direct influencers, whereas sociology studies the society as a whole.

The subject matter of these courses is diverse in nature. I believe it is quite safe to say that anthropology and sociology is the mother of all social sciences. There are 5 branches in anthropology:
1.    Biological Anthropology
2.    Cultural Anthropology
3.    Linguistic Anthropology
4.    Social Anthropology, and
5.    Archaeology

Sociology, on the other hand, has a wider scope:
1.    Sociology of culture
2.    Sociology of deviance
3.    Sociology of economics
4.    Sociology of education
5.    sociology of gender
6.    Sociology of work/industry
7.    Sociology of knowledge
8.    Sociology of law
9.    Sociology of military
10.    Sociology of politics
11.    Sociology of religion
12.    Sociology of science, and
13.    Sociology of stratification

Are you surprised to see subjects such as law, economics, and politics in the list? Well, these subjects are a part of sociology because they play a big role in society. Another fact nugget for you: these subjects were developed so extensively, it was decided that they should be split up. In Universiti Sains Malaysia, Economics is a subject still studied in the Faculty of Social Sciences, while in most universities Economics have split with the Faculty of Social Sciences to form its own faculty. I guess there is only so much the human brain can handle.

I’m personally drawn to the sociology of deviance, simply because everyone has been involved in an act of deviance at least a few times in the lifetime. Another concept in this aspect of sociology is that crime is a deviant behavior; however, not all deviant behavior is a criminal act. This is because an act of deviance is an act against societal norms whereas a criminal act has been defined and prosecutable by the law. For example, transsexuals are seen as deviants in society, but the law does not state that they can be prosecuted by law. However, a night burglary is a crime because it is defined and prosecutable according to Act 574, Section 456 of the Penal Code, which states “Whoever commits lurking house-trespass by night or housebreaking by night, shall be punished with imprisonment for a term which may extend to three years, and shall also be liable to fine, and for every second or subsequent offence shall be punished with imprisonment and shall also be liable to fine or to whipping.”

People should take a course in either anthropology or sociology for the simple reason that our society needs people who have more than just a basic knowledge of self and society. Some of the questions that arose for me and my view of society came up during my course of study are
1.    Do you like the person you see in the mirror? Why?
2.    What influenced all the decisions you’ve made so far?
3.    Can you change the course of your future?
4.    Do you like the society today? Why?
5.    Can you understand why they act that way?
6.    Can you empathize with them although you do not subscribe to their ideologies?

I’m not aware of the monetary or scholarship opportunities; however, the course will most definitely widen your worldview. This in turn will help you understand not only yourself and the people around you; it also enables you to bring gradual change in the environment you are in.

The Monkey Story

There was once 5 monkeys that were kept in a cage. Above them hung a bunch of bananas. The cage was opened and the tempting smell and sight of bananas left all the monkeys wanting to get them. 

But just as one came out of the cage, all the monkeys were doused with water and beaten back into the cage. This happened over and over again.

Soon the monkeys learned that any effort to get the bananas would involve all 5 monkeys a dousing of water and beating. 

One day, 1 monkey was taken out and another came to substitute that monkey. It had no prior knowledge to what happened before, so when it saw the bunch of bananas, it naturally went out to take it. However, before it could reach outside the cage, the other 4 monkeys, fearing that they would be doused and beaten because of this new fool, caught that monkey and beat it up. This happened a few times and the new monkey learned if it were to attempt to go out, it would be beaten up by the other monkeys. So the second monkey was rotated, then the third, then the fourth, then the fifth. By now the 2nd batch of monkeys learned that if they were to go out and attempt to take the bananas, they would be beaten down by the monkeys from the 1st batch (or the ones who got "educated" by the previous batch).

Unbeknowest to the 2nd batch of monkeys, a 3rd batch was forced to watched them from a distance since the 2nd monkey's rotation. The 2nd and 3rd batch of monkeys were now put into a bigger cage. However, none of the monkeys attempted to leave the cage. The 3rd batch learned from afar, that if they didn't want to be beaten up by the 2nd batch, they better stayed put. They never noticed the bananas from the start.

After being put in the bigger cage, the 10 monkeys never realized that the bananas and the people who put them in the cage were now gone. When hunger took over, they fought and killed each other. In the end, none was left alive. The funniest thing was none of them made a single attempt to escape the cage.

The best part was, the 1st batch knew the reason they stayed in the cage. The second batch barely knew the reason. The 3rd batch had no idea whatsoever of the 1st reason but followed blindly anyways.

Sounds familiar, politically?

The First Generation builds an empire,

The Second Generation maintains it; but

The Third Generation squanders it all.

ENGLISH AS MEDIUM OF INSTRUCTION

Commenting on  Muhyiddin: UKM proves Malay language works

Dear DPM,

English should be the medium of instruction in  all institutions of learning, especially if we want to move forward and BE RELEVANT in today's global economy. Many of our graduates are useless (and therefore jobless) in today's workforce simply because they CAN'T SPEAK PROPER ENGLISH.

If you want to use the excuse of Korea, Japan and China for being able to retain their language, therefore Malaysia can too, you are DEAD WRONG.

Korea, Japan and China are heavily industry-based and they have made it in the global market. They have their mark in the global market. Just naming a few here:

1. China
   Lenovo - Computers
   NetEase - Gaming site
   Chery - Automobile
   Gree, Haier - Electric products
2. Japan
   Toyota, Subaru - Automobiles
   Kawasaki - High end Motorcycles
   Sony - Electronics and Entertainment,       
   Bathing Ape (BAPE) - Fashion
3. Korea
   Hyundai, Kia - Automobiles
   The Face Shop, Missha - Cosmetics
   LG, Samsung - Electronics

Besides, these countries have hardworking citizens. Apart from that, when the brands go overseas, they become English too.
As for Malaysia, our best brands are mostly operated in English anyways.

And FYI, the three countries are also pushing their citizens to study English, so that they can be more competitive in the marketplace.

Pouvez-vous comprendre ce que j'essaye de dire ?

Going Once, Going Twice! Malim Nawar SOLD!!!

Malim Nawar's a place in the state of Perak, in a messed up country called Malaysia.
Ex-PKR sucker by the name of Keshvinder Singh a/l Kashmir Singh is now an independent candidate, citing "disappointment in bla bla bla bla bla.... "

Sorry la. Wasn't born yesterday.

Everyone with half a brain knows Keshvinder was given a handsome offer by BN to quit. Stop your bloody self righteousness and come up with a more original excuse will you?

Hey, PKR. You guys sure are low on funds. Then again, you don't have access to taxpayer's money huh?